Dating At Seminary

May 4th, 2010 • Related • Filed Under

So what’s it like to date at seminary?

Ed and I are working on the relationships section of the book and realized we needed to hear from more perspectives than just ours. So how about it?  Have any thoughts or perspectives on seminary dating life you think would be valuable for other seminary students?

You may leave a public comment below, or if you’d prefer to email your response, send it to mark -at- seminarysurvivalguide.com.

Thanks in advance for your help!

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  1. Comment by Matthew on 25 July 2010:

    Hello,

    My story starts back two years ago when I first arrived at Dallas Theological Seminary.

    We had just finished our first week of classes when the school held a “ice cream social” for the whole campus. After dishing up a bowl full of ice and toppings I settled on a table that had about 3 girls and 3 guys. We ended up going around introducing ourselves (all happening to be first semester students) and why we were at seminary. After I shared my desire in mission to unreached people the girl two seats down said the same thing (I thought she was just trying to impress me). We found out we were in the same classes and started sitting only a row or two a part in most of them. Believe or not she ended up transferring to my Greek section the next semester allowing us to spend more time studying together. By the end of our first semester we were spending a lot of our free time together in groups or study lounges. The next semester (Spring of 09) we started officially “dating.” We dated a year, were engaged three months, and now have been happily married for a little over a month.

    The seminary environment is a very interesting place to be in a relationship. There is the whole weird guy thing (geeks) and even the weird girl thing (those looking for husbands). However despite those things it’s a wonderful place to find a mate who is passionate about the same calling.

    The greatest struggle we faced was that of balancing time. There is such much we are telling ourselves we have to do: church, classes, homework, studying, small groups, work, personal Bible study, eating, exercise, sleep, relationships, chapel…. and the list could go on forever. So many things yet so little time.

    One struggle that arose from this issue was that when we were spending time together it wasn’t always profitable time. We were always tired our first semester (or two). As time went on we learned to say “no” to social activities and “yes” to rest and personal devotion.

    A few other comments before finishing up:

    1) Don’t let other people define the relationship for you (or force you into it.
    2) Respect the fact that the girl still has a Dad. Just give him a call and ask to date her, she’ll respect you more and so will he.
    3) Don’t be careless with your words.
    4) Don’t make any hasty decisions (esp during midterms and finals).
    5) Be quick to say “I’m sorry”
    6) Share what your learning in class with one another.
    7) Don’t JUST study together, get off campus and have fun.

    I would write more but the sleep factor is calling me.

    If you have any specific questions feel free to contact me.

    Blessings,

    Matthew

  2. Comment by Jonathan Romig on 1 September 2010:

    This is a really great site and post! I’ve wondered about all of these things! I’m just starting seminary and am going to chronicle a few lessons as I go along my journey. Looking forward to it!

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